Weaknesses (Day 13 of 30)

Describe 5 weaknesses you have.


Ohhh, I've always hated this one!!  (Even when they call them "challenges.")


1.  Insecurity.  I like myself.  I really do.  I just never know if others like me.  For real like me.  Which is somewhat crazy.  And, like most people, I hate being judged.  So, I find myself holding back.  Just keeping my mouth shut, or trying to blend in, so that I don't have to deal with the hurt feelings that come with someone's harsh judgments.  Which all points out how insecure I am.


2.  Laziness.  Given the choice of lying on the couch, watching mindless TV or cleaning, I will choose TV 9 times out of 10.  Or reading.  Or blogging.  Or Facebook.  Anything besides cleaning.  


3.  Codependency.  I have a tendency toward being codependent.  It stems from my childhood and I have a pretty good handle on it, but still struggle from time to time.  


4.  Jealousy.  I try really hard not to let this one come out, but I am quite capable of being jealous.  And not just in a romantic scenario.  I find myself envious of my siblings because they all live near each other now - when they post fun things they've done together, my heart tings and I get jealous.  Or when Wayne goes out with his friends and they have a great time, I'm a little jealous that I wasn't there to share in the fun.  (Although, I go out without him, too.)  But I wanted to be there, with him, when he was having fun.  It's really silly of me and I don't let it get in the way of anything, but it is definitely there.


5.  Lack of self-discipline.  It's why I can't be self-employed.  At a job, I feel a sense of obligation and urgency in completing my tasks - people are counting on me.  Plus, they're paying me to do xyz, so I better get it done.  But on my own, I find reasons why I don't want/have to do things.  Which is why having a gym buddy and/or personal training sessions work so well for me - someone is counting on me to be there, so I get there. 


Many... listing your faults is exhausting and somewhat depressing.  I guess you can't work on them if you don't acknowledge them, though.